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Establishing Boundaries
Guys, let me put my cards on the table. Fathers who are overly strict are lousy fathers. Men who are rigid, authoritarian, suppressive, tyrannical, domineering, and legalistic are usually men who turn their own kids away from Jesus Christ.
Men who are too strict are usually trying hard to force their kids into the Christian life. Unfortunately, kids don’t want to be around oppressive people. Nobody does. No matter how noble their intentions, men who establish and maintain a repressive, legalistic and harsh atmosphere run the risk of destroying their own kids.
Guys, you don’t get a second chance at raising kids. It is imperative to get it right the first time. And in order to do that, we have to walk very, very closely to Jesus Christ. It takes more courage to lovingly establish boundaries than it does to be arbitrary.
--Steve Farrar
Steve Farrar is the author of ten books, including the
best-sellers Point Man and Finishing Strong.
Learn more at SteveFarrar.com
June 8, 2006 at 10:46 AM | Permalink | TrackBack
Definition of Strict
One definition of strict is "extremely severe or stern." As my kids like to say, “Not!” Let’s get one thing clear, extremely severe is not what makes for a good family. Extremely severe fathers ruin their children’s lives.
Ephesians 6: 4 couldn’t be any plainer, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger.” Colossians 3:21 says the same thing with a little different twist, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.” Fathers who practice the wrong kind of strict cause their children to lose more than heart.
One wise scribe commented on Colossians 3:21 by saying, “A child frequently irritated by over-severity or injustice acquires a spirit of sullen resignation, leading to despair.” Standing tall means leaving your kids hope.
--Steve Farrar
Steve Farrar is the author of ten books, including the
best-sellers Point Man and Finishing Strong.
Learn more at SteveFarrar.com
